It was only weeks ago when the internet was flooded with tweets and second-hand rumors about Lil Wayne’s departure from Cash Money Records due to the rapper being unpleased with the label’s handling of his new Carter album. As we reported here.
Then last week, we received reports that Weezy had snuck into Baby’s multi-million dollar estate, pelted his windows with a couple of rocks, and when Baby opened the window to see what all the commotion was about, there stood Weezy in the rain holding a boom box.
“It was supposed to play music but I don’t think it’s water proof,” said Weezy who then presumably cackled annoyingly.
“What are you doing out there?” asked Baby, his white satin gown blowing in the nighttime wind.
“Without you, I’m drowning. This ship needs a captain. Baby, be my baby, baby” said Lil Wayne dropping down to one knee. He pulled a small black box from out of his pocket and opened it up, revealing a platinum ring with two dollar signs on it. “Will you marry me?”
Now, here we are on the precipice of the largest secret gay celebrity marriage in secret gay celebrity marriage history as Weezy and Baby prepare to tie the knot inside The Closet banquet hall in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. All the familiar faces are here as the Best Man Young Thug and Maid of Honor Rich Homie Quan walk down the aisle and take their place, and then it’s the groom’s turn as Weezy is carried to the altar by a plume of marijuana smoke. Finally, the beautiful blushing bride enters the fray where he is given away by the ghost of Macho Man Randy Savage. The couple say their vows, answer their “I do’s,” and seal the deal with a kiss making them the most prolific hip-hop power couple since Jay-Z and Beyonce.